Now What
- Kevin Ashmos
- Dec 27, 2025
- 1 min read
Now what?
I will spare you the intimate details of what this disease can do to your body. The three biggest things that hinder me are:
1. The weight gain, due to fluid retention because my liver isn’t working properly.
2. The lack of rest.
3. And most importantly the overall lack of knowledge about what comes next.
The weight gain has restricted me from couch to bed, bed to couch. Sitting up is difficult. I must shower sitting as well as get dressed on the floor because of my lack of mobility.
The lack of rest comes from laying down and catching an hour nap at a time because nighttime sleep is little to none.
The reason my sleep is little to none at night is because this gut wrenching fear of the unknown. This disease even puzzles the doctors because every liver/body is different and both differently to treatment.
Sounds like a pretty shitty way of living, right? Welp, it is and it’s not going to get better until I get a liver. The two main things I can control are knowing that God is in my corner and to lean on family.
All of your messages lift me up and show me God’s grace in each of you.
(FYI I will not be sharing details of the organ transplant process)
Have a Great Weekend
Song of the day
The light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it (John 1:5)
I need to hear these words over and over again because the darkness is constant. No one needs to convince us that it exists. It takes faith to believe that the darkness is not winning. It takes eyes that see beyond the here and now and to believe that the light has not been overcome.